Dear Reader, It is unclear where these letters belong, or even if they were sent or merely saved by Alice - they most likely belong with her initial rejection of his affection a few letters back, but since unclear and the next letters we have come with a gap of several months previous, we are sharing these now.
Leon,- I am so surprised, I hardly know what to say--- I hardly know what I want to say. I know I am well enough acquainted with you so I can believe what you say and I hope you know me well enough so that you will believe me when I say that the idea never enter my head that you could have such a motive as you said you did have for doing as you did. I am not near as good as I wish I was, I have a great many since to overcome.
I don’t want more than my share of happiness in this world and I don’t expect to get it. You will certainly have you share of happiness sometime to pay up for what you have had to suffer.
I think if I had of known how matters were a year ago, If I had known then what I know now about your feelings I would still have done what I could to make you see your mistake, in fact I think I would have done more than I did do, if possible, for I didn’t know then it was a mistake, and altho’ you are not happy now as matters are, yet I think you would have been more miserable if that affair had been carried out, than you are now. Possibly if I had of known then what I know now, and still have tried to get you to see your mistake, it might have given you more hopes to contend with than you had already.
I am will to do what I can to help you that I think would be the right thing to do.
Leon I pity you with my whole heart. I am so sorry that I am the cause of such misery. Take the matter to the Lord in prayer. Ask him; beg of him to relieve you of your misery. He will certainly help you sooner or later, so don’t give up. Don’t for one moment think you are going to the bad. That will never do. I do care for you, I care for you enough so that I could not stand it to see you go to the bad, or ruin your life’s happiness by acting under some rash impulse, without doing what I can to help you see where I think ---- --- (chewed)---- wrong.
But I have that same reguard for all of my cousins that are worth of any regard at all, or I fancy I have.
There must be some great mistake some where, or else our feelings would agree. What and where that mistake is will have to be proven in the future. Pray for me that the Lord will guide and direct my footsteps. And that he will give me wisdom that what ever I may do, may be for my best good, and I will do the same for you.
I will close hoping that you will never let anything come between you and your Savior----